"You make me sound more noble than I am. I wanted a better life for everyone, but I was selfish too, Suzaku. I wanted that life for myself too. I wanted to be with the people I loved, and I wanted them to be happy and safe." She looks at him with imploring eyes.

"I'm even selfish now because as sad as I am for all those people in the settlement and as much as I wish you and Lelouch never fought and he never put a geass on you," a pause, "I'm also very happy it kept you alive."

There. Now he will know. He'll know just how selfish her own heart is. Maybe then he won't blame himself so much. Or maybe he'll feel differently about her, but if he is brave enough to tel her the truth of things then she owes him the same.